My Rocketman

My husband was truly one-of-a-kind. He had this aura to him that was so light, so happy. He made people see the best in every situation, no matter what it was. While his relationship with others was enough in itself, it was his relationship with me that belongs in storybooks.

Luke and I met when I was only 15. I was working as a hostess at a local sports bar, and he started playing his first gigs there. I had that immediate school girl crush. It may have been borderline creepy, but looking back, also really cute. Obviously the years kept passing, and I continued to follow his music career on the sidelines, merely appreciative of the good tunes. Finally, in July of 2017, he reached out to me after I posted a video of me singing “Rocket Man” on Facebook. He wanted me to sing with him after all those years… and of course I jumped at the offer. A few weeks later, I came to one of his shows and he let me come up and sing some impromptu songs with him. In hindsight, it was probably horrible sounding, but I didn’t care. Neither did he. We were immediately head over heels for each other. From that hot August night to the day he left this Earth, we were inseparable.

Luke and I’s love was truly one-of-a-kind. We always took time every day to let the other know how much we loved each other and how there was nothing we wouldn’t do for the other person. It was corny, cheesy, and so incredibly beautiful. Sure, we fought like normal couples, but the difference was that we never hung on to stupid, trivial things. We knew that it was never worth it, and so rarely did we go to bed upset. He had a Luke way of making it all better, and I had a Jayme way of making sure he knew how very loved he was (even when he did something dumb).

I believed in Luke so fiercely. I told him countless times that his greatest fault was selling himself short. He was capable of so much, and I was unbelievably proud of him. The best part? That was reciprocated tenfold. I never felt self-conscious or at all limited in what I could do, as long as he was by my side. Luke always asked me with his goofy grin and ornery smile, “Do you trust me?” I never said no to that question. How could I? How could anyone? Of course I trusted him, and I still do.

I’ll never be able to wrap my head around this new reality. I will never be “okay” with any of it. It will never make sense because it wasn’t supposed to be this way. Luke and I had dreams, goals, aspirations to do big things. We had the rest of our lives in front of us, and we were so excited for what life had in store. We lived in a beautiful home filled with memories and gorgeous photos of our most favorite days. We had the world’s greatest circle of family and friends, and we cherished time spent with them. We shared the most incredible gift of making music together. We were just two souls with a passion for a good melody. Most of all, we believed so wholeheartedly in one another and the love we shared. It was always enough, and it will always be enough.

To my sweet Rocket Man, my heart aches for you. I love you, LJ.

And I think it’s gonna be a long long time
‘Till touch down brings me round again to find
I’m not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I’m a rocket man
Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone, and I think it’s gonna be a long long time
.”

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1 thought on “My Rocketman

  1. You have a wonderful way with words and, honestly, this is a beautiful way of dealing with such an unpredictable situation. Grief is forever, but is also always evolving. I wish you luck, Jayme, and hope writing about your love and life brings you exactly what you need (whenever you figure out what that is).

    Liked by 1 person

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